Boundaries dating physical
After my first breakup the sudden lack of physical touch was hard for me to cope with and there was a desire to seek that fulfillment in wrong places.
But after the second breakup, there was no sudden drop off of physical intimacy, so I was much healthier in that aspect. I learned that during the second relationship and I’ve seen it in many other relationships too. And for each couple there can be different situations that may cause more temptation than others.
While I spoke briefly about this in a sermon titled, “Sex, Soul Ties, and Pornography,” I wanted to give some clearer guidelines and tips for healthy physical boundaries in a dating relationship.
When I first dated in high school I didn’t really have any clear boundaries aside from wanting to wait until marriage for sex and also sensing that there shouldn’t be inappropriate touching.
We still kept our boundaries in regards to unhealthy touching and we waited until we were married. I knew I had a couple Christian brothers I had to update each month about how we were doing and receive prayer from. The purpose of an accountability partner isn’t to be policed, but rather to pray for one another and keep each other’s head on straight. Make sure not to get a partner who is struggling with his/her purity or is disinterested. Apply that wisdom to your relationship and avoid beds together until you’re married. Avoid closed doors and solitary homes/apartments/dorm rooms.
She had a couple Christian sisters she spoke with as well. All three of us kept pure until marriage and all three of us have amazing marriages. This especially goes for couples that are young and aren’t getting married anytime soon (as in within a few months).
Although I was pretty confident that Sky was the one even early in the relationship, my preference was that if we were to breakup that there wouldn’t be that physical tie between each other. My desire was to honor Sky as an unmarried woman while I was dating her, treating her in a way that wouldn’t evoke jealousy in her future husband or cause regret for her.
You have to be honest with yourself and with the person you’re dating in these situations.